Miss YOu alL!

I miss all my friends so much. Really dont know when can we meet up again and do all the things that we did together. I wish i could turn back time. They are the only person who i really enjoy being together. I can just be myself when i am with them. We understand each other so much. We are just so comfortable with each other. Too Bad! We are all apart from each other. Some got married, some working hard and earning hard, some with their own family to care of. I always laugh at Rico saying that he never grow up and still living in the past.. Haha! actually I realise that I am becoming more and more like him. I just miss those days. We can cry on each other shoulders. We are like brothers and sisters. Never feel lonely cos there are always someone there for you. Sigh... Those were the days...!!!

Beep-less!

My phone didnt Beep! at all today! I didnt receive any sms or any calls...! I give myself a deadline... If he is not initiating any sms or call today... THis will be it!! It will be the end of my hope! I will give up all hope and i wil lnot wait anymore.. LIFE is SHORT! Dont waste time! What say you?!

My cousin asked me to confess my feeling to him! Nothing to lose! YES or NO? At least i have tried. But i will loose my pride, where am i going to put my face the next time i see him... If i got rejected?! My ego... !!! I cant cross this line.

Questions without answers...!!

I have very bad mood swing today. A lot of unanswered questions floating in my mind.....
Who did he go out with?
Why cant i get some rest on Sunday?
Why must i be in the office on Sunday?
When is my rest day?
Why he didnt reply my message last night?
Did he go out with the "bitch" last night?
He told me he was tired, then why did he come home and go out again?
Did i bore him last night?
Why cant my parents just give me some freedom?
Why cant i have more friends?
Why cant i meet more guys? more eligible guys?
Am i that ugly?
Where is my prince charming?
Is he the one?
Why cant i stop thinking of him?
Will i ever have a chance to be with him?
Is there anyone out there, to tell me whats on his mind?
Am i going nuts?

Someone... please answer for me!!!!!!!!!!!
Arghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

Untitled

I cant think of a title for this post. My brain is stucked! I have been meeting up and hanging up with the same group of friends over the same reason. I have only one person in my mind over the weeks. The same person for the same reason have been haunting my life since 2nd of June. I am annoyed. I always hate this thing yet i always get into this trouble. I have a lot to say but i have problems putting it into words. Some things are just so difficult to explain and there is no specific explaination or so whatever.... I am lost of words somehow.

I am very confused and I am very lost! He is not the guy i wanted after all. But, something is attracting me. Something is pulling my heart closer to him. Something is making me to just cant stop thinking about him. His laughter, his smile, the way he talks, the way he looks at me, the way he makes me laugh... its all recorded and kept playing over and over again in my mind. I tried not to think about him. I tried not to sms him. But I failed. The small little thing that he did to me, will just make me smile. Yes! I am silly!

I was with him last night of course with another friend. He stood by the car door and waited for me to get down, he pulled a chair for me and adjusted it higher for me when we were in the pub, when we were leaving the pub, he waited for me, open the door for me, walk behind me cos they were drunkards around.... All the small little things that he did, really impressed me.... ok.. fine.. you might think that i am nuts! I am silly! I am dumbass! Let me tell you this... HE MADE MY DAY, AND HE SPOILT MY DAY!!!! He Cheered me Up and He Let me Down!!

Suddenly i just remember this song and it stucks in my head....
All THe small things,
True Cares, truth brings
I'll take one lift,
your Ride, Best Trips....

Always I know,
you'll be At my show,
Watching, waiting,
Commiserating...

Say it ain't so, i will not go,
turn the lights off,
carry me HOme......... (by Blink 182)