I am not 8 years old anymore!

I am very angry today. I am angry with myself cos i can never gain my parents' trust. It has been like 2 months i didnt go out at night. Is not that i dont feel like going out but is that i dont want to argue with my parents becos of me going out so often. To tell the truth, I can grow mushrooms staying at home everyday like that. Its so boring staying at home lying on the bed doing nothing. I am so sick of watching cantonese series in the tv room cos i feel so lifeless. I have no one to turn to when i feel like talking. But i forced myself to do that cos I dont want to create argument. I tot after being so good for a while, it is ok for me to go out once in a while. And i did try my best to come back before 12 midnight. But no.... thigns are not like what i tot it will be. Once i step out from the house, my mum started to suspect this and that. I feel like vomiting whenever i think about it. Whats wrong having friends to go out with? Whats wrong? I am veyr decent. I just go out to drink coffee to catch up with friends. I didnt do anything wrong. I am a human being i need friend. I need someone to talk to at the same frequency. I need someone share my tots with me. But y? Why cant my parents understand me for this? I am turning 29 this year. I am not 8 years old anymore. They are ppl who is much much younger than me, they have more freedom than me!!! What is this? What have i done wrong? I am seriously going crazy. I really will go crazy staying this way. Because of my parents, i miss a chance to meet the person i am supposed to meet. Someone eligible. thigns are all screwed up now!!!!!

Me and Kah Seng's wife. The 2nd wedding i attended in 2008. (23rd February 2008)



Me and Kah Seng @ his wedding... you can tell from our face... Our body system contains too much alcohol...



Siew Mei's wedding on the 1st March 2008. What a lovely bride?!

Everything~

Everything

I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes

I am the wisest woman that you've never met
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen and you've never met anyone
Who is as positive as I am sometimes

You see everything and you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

I blame everyone else not my own partaking
My passive aggressive-ness can be devastating
I'm terrified and mistrusting and you've never met anyone
Who is as closed down as I am sometimes

What i resist persists and speaks louder than i know
What i resist you love no matter how low or high i go

I'm the funniest woman that you've ever known
I am the dullest woman that you've ever known
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known and you've never met anyone
who is as everything as I am sometimes