Just So you kNOW!!

"Just So You Know"

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around, I can't let her win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all
Before I go
Just so you know

It's getting hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

This emptiness is killing me
And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here

-A song by Jesse McCartney-

I really love this song because he sings my heart out... And thats exactly how im feeling right now. I am trying very hard to let him go. But i couldn't. I decided to tell him off. And till today i didn't get any reply from him. After living for 28 years, thats was my 1st time being so frank and so straight forward towards a guy. He is supposed to appreciate my effort that i have put in and my feelings for him. I didn't know it is a sin to like a person. THis have been torturing me and i have been struggling! Everyone have been telling me that he is not right for me...!!! Kah Seng told me that....i deserve someone better.... 100 times better than him.... I told him LOVE IS BLIND!!! My cousin told me that he is not rich, not educated and he is a drunkard!!!! He can never support me!!! He has a good heart, he is caring, hardworking, good looking and he is patience..... Thats enough for me!!! Now i hardly keep in touch with him.... I dunno what to say to him... it is so awkward to face him now...!!!