Whats your goal?

I went out coffee with the guy i adore last night... we were chatting and suddenly he popped a question to me...."Whats your goal in life?" "What do you want to achieve in this 2 years time?" I was stunt! I dunno what to answer and i just kept thinking... I felt like telling him " hope that you will get rich in this 2 years time then i will marry you!!! Hahahahah" but i didnt.... i told him i dunno what i want, and i have no objective in life... and i said "maybe to get someone with Heart, Cash and Look... to get married with...!!! "Hahaha!!! Thats quite true actually... and his answer was "You are too much! Nothing is Perfect in this world, you have to accept your fate, you cannot be so choosy!!!"
What he said was true... I am not a good looking girl.. I dont carry that kind of quality to deserve someone with Heart Cash and LOOK...!!! I am ugly fat, quite rude sometimes...!!!! hahahah..!!! well, it was a good question and i have been thinking for an answer since last night...!!! :)
His answer was, to have someone to accompany him to walk through the rest of his life... cos he is afraid of being alone for the rest of his life....!!! In my heart i was thinking... "Go work hard and earn more money.... then here i come to hold your hand and walk through with you.... cos i am afraid of being alone too.."
:)

PAPERS

I hate papers.. there are so troublesome and i have no way to escape from all these papers. Normally i just clip all of them with big Clips and put them aside, But somehow when i need to search for them.. i have whole lots of problems... so i decided to do filing today.... to file them accordingly and to refile some of them.. yet i still cant get them done in one day. All the papers consist of different kind of informations.... important or not still you just cant chuck them away.... cos you dunno when do you need them again. When the postman come tomorrow, i will have a stack of them to do filing again... neverending... !!! I am so sick of it!!!

I am going to get a clerk to do only filing... Filing and filing... but i just cant get this person...!!!!!!!!

Tears And Rain

How I wish I could surrender my soul;

Shed the clothes that become my skin;

See the liar that burns within my needing.

How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.

How I wish I had screamed out loud,

Instead I've found no meaning.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,

All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.

Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.

I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.

It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;

Hold memory close at hand,

Help me understand the years.

How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.

How I wish I would save my soul.

I'm so cold from fear.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,

All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.

Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.

I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.

Far, far away; find comfort in pain.

All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.

It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

Tears and Rain.

Tears and Rain.

Far, far away; find comfort in pain,

All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.

It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

G.U.Y

After all these years, I still cant understand whats on a guy's mind.

Sometimes they can be really nice to you, makes you feel like you are the luckiest person in this whole wide world, they can be so caring, and they can really touch your heart like you want them to be, they can read your mind and understand every bits of you, they notice the slightest movement you made where no one else could....

Sometimes they are totally the opposite, they left you hanging without letting you know whats the next, they can be so cruel, so cold, so inconsiderate, makes you feel like you are the dumbest person in this whole wide world, they dont notice you even you have just walked pass right infront of them, they see nothing in you, and they just walked away without giving you any reasons, any warnings, any informations, any hints.....

I hate it!! I hate the feeling of being hanging up like a dumbass! You cant tell anyone cos you feel so stupid. You feel so lousy and you feel so upset. You feel like walking right to his face and ask him whats going wrong. (well, it wont happen..) you check your handphone 10,000,000 times a day, waiting for his news, his sms, his miss calls or anything....just to find out that there is nothing...

You will start telling yourself that:
He is a fool...(not really lah...),
I am not going to do anything....( what if i just sms him...??...)
Stupid... he is ignoring me....( no lah, maybe he is very busy...),
HIM only what... Whats the big deal? .....( but, he is quite nice ...)
I am a LOOSER!!!.... (Yes! I am a LOOSER!!!)